About This Blog

by Denise Matteau

My name is Denise Matteau. If you google it, you might  find an increasingly bizarre set of references that appear to be related to me. You will also find lots of geneologies going back to various French roots of many Denise Matteaus, but the increasing number of forum profiles who are posting my name in entries full of bizarrely hateful attributions and allegations is why I am opening this blog. Whatever is out there, is out there. This is me, under my own name, and featuring my own face in my own videos.

I live in Texas. I am an artist. I am a Catholic. Any questions? Here I am. Ask.

I'm putting related videos, links and other material in the side-bar for you to peruse. Let me know if you have anything to add.

I have become a target of the Rick Ross Institute, (RRI) a notorious American organization founded by an activist named Rick A. Ross. His epynominous Institute is nothing more than a cover for a network of hate-motivated anti-religion activists with a long history of mob-stalking, personal harassment, and even criminal violations of the rights of a wide variety of individuals who have come to RRI's attention.

RRI is a School For Hate. I came to RRI's attention because I naively expressed an opinion about what actually constitutes a seriously dangerous or terrorist "cult"  and  I criticized RRI for attacking a group for no better reason than that the group is eccentric. I am not even a member of the group in question, but because I do have a strong background in actual "cult" research myself, and I have worked with some others in that field who have avoided the hate-mongering style of RRI, I seem to pose a special threat to RRI activists just by having a pulse and a voice. Apparently anyone who is both willing and able to make substantial criticisms of RRI poses the same kind of threat.

Tonight I was motivated to finally open a blog dedicated to this problem because one of the RRI's fringe associates has begun moving the attack-postings off the platform of "let's just tell the world Denise is fat and ugly" onto a double track of calling for multiple "reports" of me to "authorities" and also an attempt to characterize me as someone who is likely to be suicidal. This is "Verity Evangelene" aka "Sisi" among other names in the RRI forum at rickross.com  and the xjcs.org forum. She is dedicated to the downfall of a strange little group called the "Jesus-Christians" with whom I have had some contact. By having contact with them, I have apparently become someone who must be eliminated from Sisi/Agur/Verity Evangelene's world.

Frankly, I am not part of her world and she needs to get out of mine. Her world is in the far frozen North and is populated by people who have no purpose in life except to heap abuse on others for their own amusements and also to insinuate themselves in obscene ways into the personal family and friendship relations of others. But she seems to think her world extends over the whole planet so that she must eliminate others. I know my world is not very big and I have no desire to go outside it to interfere with people in other worlds, especially not to interfere with the denizens of such horrifically hateful and narcissistic worlds as Sisi's. My world is populated by artists, writers, and a handful of spiritually serious people. It is limited to my parochial community in the sunny South, thousands of miles from Sisi/Verity Evangelene frozen wasteland, and my work concerns only the people I serve, all of whom know me well enough to express nothing but astounded sympathy when someone like Sisi invades a world which has nothing but contempt and loathing for her and her kind. She and her kind are driven by demons of hate who think that no Christian has the right to face them or to defend the Christian world from their hateful intrusions.

Sisi/Verity Evangelene, who has also been known to use the name Susan Smith Summers and who claims to live in Victoria, Canada, has libeled me repeatedly and even joined a few of her criminal friends to threaten to make videos of morphed images of my deceased daughter. She is someone who is utterly uneducated and anti-intellectual. It is embarrassing to find myself having to mount a defense against someone like her. I am a middle-aged woman and she acts like a sexual predator. She has actually posted as if she is intimate with me and has sent emails to people claiming to be a friend who is "concerned" for me and wants something done to "help" me. She posts about how she loves people and they must accept her involvment in their lives.

She attacks me because I have told her in answering posts that she is a filthy predator and she needs to leave me and my family alone. She is a total stranger whose intrusions into my life and my relationships have been uninvited and she has refused to honor every insistence from me that she stop stalking my private affairs. She thinks that because she found out I occasionally sell things in Ebay and once had an injury requiring a company to pay a hospital bill she has the right to post it along with lists of quotes taken from various unrelated discussion boards (often heated discussions among Catholics like myself) while she claims I have to be "stopped" from engaging in such terrible behavior, and it is mind-boggling to see the degree to which she orchestrates an image of a terrible person, and she gets other profiles to agree with her that I am a public danger. She facilitates a real lynch-mob dynamic with no more accusation than what I just listed. She even took some jokes I was sharing with other antiques-dealers about throwing counterfeiters to the alligators and tried to claim that was serious! When I made a joke in another forum about my "faithful budgie" she posted a long harangue claiming I was a paranoid recluse who imagined conspiracies against budgies, and she got a few of her cohorts to repeat that set of libelous insults. This would be hilarious if she were not seriously involved with that RRI gang of fellow internet-stalkers who actually have a history of generating tabloid media attacks on people over equally spurious allegations.

She gets people to agree to post to each other if they see me active anywhere in any capacity so that complaints can be filed to stop me from having any business and to interfere in any rights I might have in any private matter. Just because something is public knowledge does not mean it is the public's business to interfere. Why should anyone care that I had to go through the routine of forcing a department store to pay a hospital bill when I broke my shoulder on their premises? Does she think I enjoyed a broken shoulder? Does she think a fractured bone can be faked? She was willing to post her assaults as if I were a slip-and-sue monster when no lawsuit was ever filed because I never asked for anything more than to have the ER bill paid with their insurance instead of mine and it was paid. What kind of gain was that for me? And she attacked me with this monstrous posting years after the fact just because she was able to dig up a question from me which was under a nicname in which I asked a legal forum what I should do about the bill. I remember posting the question with my one good hand, my left hand, while my right shoulder was still immobilized.

That series of assaults was her retaliation for me telling her to stop attacking me with her disgusting speculations about my relationships with other people or my personal life. Her behavior is exactly like sexual stalking behavior and it is truly sick. She has several disgusting thuggie friends who egg her on, but she is truly the center of her own sick game. I throw up at the thought of her vile postings, and I recognize what she is doing. It is demonic. I pray for protection and deliverance from her demon-driven libels. I cannot spend my life on lawyers trying to sue her across national boundaries, for she is a coward who chooses to attack her American victims from her safely frozen lair in Canada. She posts whatever information she can find about her targets along with character assasination and she calls to her thuggie friends in this country to start following us around, making frivolous complaints to harass us in our daily lives.

But I certainly can post in my own defense against such unbridled hate. I never knew such a she-devil existed until I saw the first postings she made about me in that forum filled with demons that I had not previously seen. The forum is owned by Nick Croft, a man who devotes himself to directing his little coterie of demons against the Christian world. (For though they claim to want to persecute only one particular group of Christians, in fact they attack anyone who is seen in Christian fellowship with that group.)


Sisi/Verity Evangelene/Agur is someone who has made extremely inappropriate remarks under her "Verity Evangelene" profile which were directed at me about my daughter's recent death. My daughter died at age 34 in August, 2010. This Sisi person has actually tried to insinuate herself into my personal affairs by circulating an email nominating herself as my "concerned friend"! She did this in the week following my daughter's death. A total stranger actually willing to do such a thing to anyone, this is a truly mind-boggling, nauseating, and horrific act of personal violation!

Tonight Sisi/Verity Evangelene posting as "Agur", began the set-up for authorities and especially for media to characterize me as a suicidal person. To what end is she doing this? To what end is the Rick Ross Institute allowing her to do this in their forum? I am not worried about her rants causing any assaults on my person because I live within a very stable social network and also, as a citizen of Texas, I am quite confident the authorities around here will not put much credence into any reports that come to them from a plethora of strangers calling any Texan crazy and suicidal just because we feel free to have conversations with independent Christian witnesses. The authorities will all have a link to this blog and will see the repeated calls for frivolous and malicious reports she and the Rick Ross Institute have made against people who do nothing more than go about our lives, working in our own communities, engaging in theological discussions, writing books and articles, painting images, bothering no one. This blog seems to me like a wiser use of the taxpayer's money than for me to pester my local departments with a string of requests for protection from a "Sisi" in all her disguises and her mob of cohorts who may or may not be separate individuals and who may or may not reside in the globally scattered places from which they seem to post. Authorities like to see hard evidence of where people are and precisely when, where and how they are breaking the laws before accepting reports. RRI unfortunately uses its vast resources to hide such evidence of its members' whereabouts while they engage in well-orchestrated terrorism of individuals and small independent religious groups.

Here is the quote that inspired me to open this blog:

Well zeuszor. I wish I could give you a hug and I mean that. No one should feel that way. Don't let anyone rob you of the precious gift of life as obviously you make a terminal and permanent choice over a temporary feeling or problem when you commit suicide. I wonder if Mr. McKay is aware of how bad he makes people feel? Does he care?

Now you are the second person to put such thoughts into writing, the other was a woman who said she was being driven to consider ending her life and she pointed the finger directly at Dave McKay for his abusive treatment of her on his forum. I hope this woman is alright as she vasilated back and forth between the forums sometimes loving Dave McKay and other times wishing he would never communicate with her again.

It is a very strange quote. It does not clearly relate to me and so you might understandably wonder if I have a few screws loose, but it is part of a dialogue with "zeuzsor", an RRI activist who has enjoyed unusual success in his christian-hunting career by being able to appear on the Jeremy Kyle show in the UK as an opponent to Dave McKay. It reflects Sisi's sick obsession with imaginary intimate personal relations among strangers. (For, contrary to what one might think, Sisi/Verity Evangelene is not a disgruntled former member of the Jesus-Christians. She never had more than internet contact with them.)

Dave McKay himself is a controversial man who has written a number of books on eschatology, particularly a trilogy challenging the Tim Lahaye "Left Behind" heresy. McKay has a following of some note since he founded a communal group of Christian witnesses who are engaged in a number of services around the world. My forum conversations with him covered a wide range of topics, including questions of how his often biting personal remarks relate to larger subjects. Only a tragically under-educated person would interpret such conversations as some kind of online confessional and would think that writers and their readers discussing their books are engaged in some kind of intimate affair.

Both Zeuzsor and Verity Evangelene have dedicated themselves to destroying Dave McKay's career,  family, friendship networks, and even, it sometimes seems, his life, and twisting all communications both to and from them. They openly insult Mrs. McKay as Dave's "consort".

Who am I in relation to this? I am an artist with a background in cult research myself, and I like to read novels, and I often have conversations with other writers and artists. I do not consider such conversations to be the kind of sordid intimate affairs that fascinate people of Verity Evangelene's level, and it deeply embarrasses me to even have to refer to someone of that type.  But upon my first appearance in a discussion in the forum where Dave McKay presents his books, I was named and discussed by Verity Evangelene in a completely separate forum that has no purpose other than to attack Dave McKay and anyone who discusses his writings or associates with other Christian witnesses of all kinds in that forum.

The hate forum from which attacks on Dave Mckay and the Jesus Christians are often launched, http://xjcs.org/ , owned by Nick Croft, makes me think of the Ayatollah Khomaini's rage against Salman Rushdie. Seriously, only the absence of a million dollar bounty and a world-wide network of Islamic jihadists is missing from this scene! And I have not even written a novel of any kind (at least not published), never mind one that could rise to the level of Rushdie's prose. But Dave and Cherry McKay have written novels that seem to touch a religious nerve in those RRI bigots. Together they wrote "The Destroyers", an Apocalyptic account of a fictional village family in Kenya, and Dave McKay wrote "Survivors", which is a novel showing a very different theology from the popular Lahaye Rapture heresy and "Listeners" which is a more ecumenical Christianity than LaHaye's fundamentalism. Interestingly enough, Lahaye's apocalyptice plot promotes militia violence while McKay's promotes a more pacifist response to the Tribulation. And McKay's books, like Salman Rushdie's, are fiction, after all. Fiction which challenges some official or popular violent theology. This paralell is worth noting.

"Zeuzsor" posts in an interesting dance with Sisi/Agur, raising the spectre of suicide and giving her the opening to start throwing it in my direction. McKay and I have gone back and forth on many issues in our discussions in his open forum, as have McKay and quite a few others. Novelists are often pretty dynamic in their discussions and so it should not surprise any literate person that a discussion with McKay can be a challenge. It is truly nauseating to see that in the mind of people like those two, zeuzsor and Sisi, such conversations are grounds for almost pornographic third-party gossip.

I have a channel in Youtube here and also a page in Facebook, both under my own legal name. I have decided that the best way to deal with this very disturbed and disturbing duo as well as the RRI (of which they are both very active members) is to be totally out-front and consequences be damned. My daughter died weeks after their assualts on me began, this past summer, and I have nothing at all to lose. They have certainly put me in a "make my day" kind of mood.


Having nothing to lose is not to say I have nothing. I am indeed a very successful artist with my own vocation in the private sphere (far outside their paltry realm) and I will not lose any friends or any professional support to these ignorant bigots because I have no connection to anyone who would respect them.

I have created this blog in my own interest and in the interest of all other victims of the RRI hate movement, a movement of which Zeuzsor and Verity Evangelene/Sisi/Agur are perhaps the two most vile examples outside of Rick A. Ross himself.